


Was

by justK



Category: K.A.R.D (Band)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-10-13 02:41:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17479676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justK/pseuds/justK
Summary: Jiwoo has a chance to love.





	Was

**Author's Note:**

> As always, I apologise for any misspelling errors. I hope you like it :)

The park was one of the quietest places she knew, especially this one because there were hardly any people, Jiwoo really did not understand why, it was even more beautiful than the most popular, but she appreciated it, that made it her own special place.

She threw the last piece of bread at the ducks and bent over to cut a beautiful, simple tulip. She heard footsteps behind her and got up quickly, as was well known, there were no people and she was frightened by the sudden noise.

He was a tall, handsome guy who radiated security.

“Were you going to hit me?” The guy asked.

“No,” Jiwoo denied. “Why?”

He only pointed to the rock Jiwoo had in her hand, she had not realized when she had grabbed it. She lowered it down.

“It's not a very good way to meet someone,” he observed and Jiwoo laughed reluctantly.

“Well,” she said. “Normally it is alone whenever I come. You scared me.”

“I understand, that's why you caught my attention.”

“Did I?”

“Yeah, it's not common to find such a cute girl around here.” Jiwoo lowered her head. “Do you come a lot?”

“Yes, whenever I can. But we had never coincided.”

“I'm glad this time we did.”

Jiwoo looked at him intrigued.

 

_Something caught her attention from the first moment she saw him. Leaving aside how handsome he was, he radiated a different feeling that had captivated her from the first moment._

_She had felt a current flowing from head to toe and although she had acted very sure of herself, inside she felt nervous._

_He had been kind and he seemed to be lightened and his facade made her want to know him without delay, because he seemed to be different and something told her that was where she was supposed to be, that she was meant to meet him. He had smiled very lightly with his lips sealed. And she had done something she rarely did, she smiled back._

 

“Sorry,” she heard a male voice say. She lifted her head and looked at him strangely.

“You want to kill me,” Jiwoo said at last from the floor. He laughed.

“I said I'm sorry, I didn't see you,” he held out his hand and she took it to stand.

“You should be more careful, you were going very fast,” she said like a mother.

“I was in a hurry, I wanted to get to a store before they closed, but I think I'll have to wait until tomorrow,” he explained.

"Was it very important?” She knew it was his fault that he had bumped her, but she felt guilty that he had lost the few minutes he had left.

“It can wait,” he assured her, and she nodded without another word. “Do you want to go for coffee?”

Jiwoo's eyes widened in surprise, but she did not want to look rude.

“Sure.”

 

_He loved coffee as much as she did, although she liked it better because each time they had one she had more time and opportunity to meet him. There is no better way to express yourself than being in the company of another in a quiet place with good coffee. Although Jiwoo was very reserved, she had allowed him to know her, because it was certainly unfair to be curious about him and not allow him to be curious about her._

_Coffee became their emblem and so gradually they made their way into each others life._

 

She opened the door to find a huge bouquet of lilacs. Behind them she appreciated his smiling face, she smiled as well without abandoning her surprised and somewhat confused expression.

“What is this?” She asked, still amazed.

“Just one detail,” he gave her the flowers. “I saw them and thought of you.”

Jiwoo looked away from the flowers to look at his expression and at the end she gave him a hug.

“Thank you.”

 

_Daisies were her favorite flowers. She liked them because they were simple but beautiful._

_Over time, he began to bring her a bouquet every week because they were not expensive flowers and because he knew they made her happier than any expensive gift would ever make. And she began to fall for him, because he was all that she longed for._

_Jiwoo loved that he showed up on Fridays with the characteristic bouquet, because it indicated that they were about to have a beautiful day. They never knew what they would do, they were lovers of deciding things at the moment, letting everything come out genuine, simple and always beautiful. Like daisies._

 

“Here,” he spread out more bread and she took it.

“Come duckie,” she spoke as if the animal could actually understand her.

He smiled, he loved her way of being so tender.

When she finished feeding the ducks, she took a seat next to him on the bench and leaned on his great torso as he put an arm around her shoulders.

“You know?” He asked.

“Hmm?”

“I am grateful to have come that day.”

“When?”

“When we met,” he replied. “I'm so happy to have met you, Jiwoo.”

As usual, Jiwoo remained serious, it didn't mean she did not feel anything, she was just very reserved. But he did not immediately misunderstand her silence and she thanked him, because in her mind she was analyzing.

Did she like him? Yes.

Did she want him? Yes.

Was she ready? No. And probably never would be.

But her body ignored her thoughts and when she least thought it, she had drawn him to her lips to kiss him.

 

_He was not well and she knew it. She had given him his space, but she had grown tired of just look at him and not be able to do anything. So she tried to talk to him, let him know that she was and always would be for him, that he could ask for help, that she wanted to help him._

_But she had never seen him angry. It was not as if he had completely transformed himself, but he had raised his voice and seemed to act more erratically, he insisted on pushing her away because it was his business, he had not hurt her directly, but his behavior did._

_Jiwoo had almost shouted at him that he did not have to carry everything himself, if he had someone who was willing to help him._

_And then he turned with the most serious and threatening expression to walk to her. She did not move because she did not think he could hurt her. And she was right. He simply took her face and pressed a kiss to her lips._

_And Jiwoo swore there was no better feeling in the world._

 

Dinner with her parents had gone great. Unsurprisingly, Jiwoo's mother seemed nostalgic, but at the same time she was glad her daughter had finally found someone to love and make her happy.

So they found themselves back in Jiwoo's apartment after saying goodbye to her parents.

Jiwoo opened the door to enter, and before stepping in, she turned to look at him.

“Do you want to stay?”

He answered with a kiss.

She never thought she would feel ready to take the next step, but all doubt faded when they walked through the apartment without separating until they reached the room.

 

_She loved him. She was sure. That is why she did not hesitate to give herself to him._

_That night had probably been the best she'd ever had and it had been with him._

_There were no words to describe what she felt._

_He had been the first, not only in her body, but in her life and Jiwoo was sure that she would never love anyone as she loved him._

 

They walked holding hands because it was satisfactory to Jiwoo to feel his hand.

Out of nowhere she felt the need to say it.

“I like having you by my side.”

A rather random comment, but that meant too much.

 

_In order for him to stay he must be convinced of what he had in mind. His parents obviously preferred that he go with them, but he would not let them, much less knowing that if he did, he would have to leave Jiwoo._

_Jiwoo was in charge of giving him the encouragement he needed, because she loved to support him and because she did not want him to leave either. She believed in him and loved him too much to let him go._

_Even after sacrificing herself on some things to help him, she knew that she had done the right thing. He had told her that he appreciated having her not only by his side but also on his side. Against everything and everyone._

 

“I want to return to Korea,” Jiwoo said. “We got an opportunity there.”

At no point did she release his hand, because it helped her feel the support he gave her.

“No, Jiwoo,” said her father. “We came for a very important reason, there is nothing for you there.”

“Your father is right, Jiwoo, it's for your sake.”

She had neither the strength nor the courage to debate them. So she just got up and walked into the garden with him following her.

“We struggled to get a chance there,” she heard him say. “I know that's what you want, what we both want and if you're willing, I'm on your side.”

 

_She packed everything quickly and waited for him to pick her up._

_She felt a bit dramatic, the way they had decided to leave the country overnight, made it look like they were running away. Jiwoo chuckled to herself. He had asked permission from her parents for a trip he had "been planning for months", a complete lie because it was more of a backpacking trip. But that was the point._

 

She had not dared to disobey her parents, but she encouraged him to go to Korea to not lose the offer they had made him.

He was coming back in a couple of days and Jiwoo was scared. She had a bad feeling that she couldn't ignore, because if she had learned anything, was to never ignore a hunch.

 

_He never came. And Jiwoo thought he had had a problem and that was why he had delayed. She tried to call him, but he did not answer, so she only had to wait._

_And she waited._

_And she waited._

_And she waited more._

 

She hurriedly entered the hospital, desperately asking for the room, but no one seemed to listen. She was hysterical.

In the end she managed to be guided and ran as if her life depended on it to the room.

There he was, apparently asleep under some sedation, but he seemed fine.

“Are you family?” A nurse asked as she was leaving.

“I'm his girlfriend.”

The nurse said no more and let her go.

His mother was asleep holding his hand and his father was pacing the room.

”How is he?” She asked anxiously.

“Stable,” replied his father.

Jiwoo nodded, she loved her in-laws, but the situation made everyone treat each other coldly.

She walked to the other side of the stretcher and watched. She had not had a chance to cry, she felt she had no tears to draw, but inside she felt herself tearing, inside she had entered into a state of madness and despair so great that she felt helpless and unable to prove it.

“Come on, my dear,” she heard. “Let's leave them alone.” And his parents left the room.

When she was finally alone with him, she felt her barriers collapse.

She cried as she had not cried in a long time as she dropped into the chair holding his inert hand.

“Jiwoo?” She heard his faint raspy voice. She moved immediately to see him, still crying.

“Yes,” she replied. “I'm here.”

“Don't cry,” he asked faintly.

Jiwoo hugged him without harming him, but as if her life was gone in it.

“I'm so sorry I sent you,” she said in a choked, broken voice, which carried so much pain that it could have made anyone's skin prickle.

“I'm fine, Jiwoo,” he assured her.

 

_She had fallen asleep in the chair in a rather awkward position, but she had refused to leave his side. She could not leave knowing nothing was definitive, she could not leave his side because after all he loved to have her by his side and on his side. Against everything and everyone._

 

When she had been ready, she found her parents waiting for her in the dining room.

The day was cloudy, it was not raining but it did not look as sunny either. She hated days like this. But this time it did not seem so bad.

 

_Everyone was watching, but she did not care. She bent down to leave a kiss, letting out a tear._

 

“You shouldn't be making any effort,” she scolded.

“You act more like my mom than my mom,” he said.

“I'm serious, the doctor said you should rest, I know you're doing your best, but maybe you'd better obey.”

She did not mean to berate him, she was simply afraid that something would happen to him. After the accident she had realized that she wanted him more than she had believed. And she hated that they had to go through it, but it was just what she needed to open her eyes.

 

_She watched as they lowered the coffin until it was completely out of sight. She cried even louder._

_When it was all over and everyone was gone, she knelt in front of the stone to leave a bouquet of daisies, like the ones he used to bring her every Friday. She also left a coffee on the floor while she carried another to her lips._

_«We shouldn't have even thought about it.»_

 

The boy in front of her always radiated joy, his features and his brown hair made him look like a sunny day.

At first she was afraid to approach because she was not ready to start again. But he had earned her heart and Jiwoo knew he had been put in her way for a reason. She had to move on.

 

_The boy who had once been by her side was a mystery, he used to remind her of the night because of his dark hair and his strange way of being, he had a beauty that only Jiwoo was able to admire._

_He had been her first love, she had been afraid because she did not know exactly what she was experiencing. But her time with him had undoubtedly been the best of her life._

 

Jiwoo loves Matthew.

Because he had made her come back to life, to love again, he had made her see that she still had a life to enjoy.

 

_But Jiwoo used to love Taehyung._

_Because he was the first to give meaning to her existence in a different way, because no one had loved her like he did._

 

Jiwoo loves Matthew.

 

_Jiwoo loved Taehyung._

 

Because Matthew was here.

 

_But Taehyung was not._


End file.
